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Published: February 2, 2010
Your Lawsuit is Making My Meal Sad
Out Of The Blue  ootb646.com
The other night I was settling into my bedtime routine, getting
all comfy and relaxed, half assed watching the news (just to
be informed about impending snow) and blissfully awaiting my
pre-lights out routine of catching an episode of
Seinfeld. But
the only thing I saw on my TV was
Nightline. Nightline! I quickly
clicked on the guide to see that
Seinfeld had been bumped to
midnight. WTF! Doesn’t my local ABC station know that I fall
asleep to the witty antics of Jerry, Elaine, Kramer and George
every night? And that it’s not possible for me to stay up later
than 12:05 a.m. to get my nightly fix?
(watch Nightline clip here)

Even though I’m not your usual Nightline viewer, the headliner
did grab my attention. A mother is suing McDonald’s over the
Happy Meal toys. Since I was already in a pissy mood about
missing out on my Seinfeld fix and my whole bedtime routine was messed up anyhow, I decided to
watch. This mother, who we’ll call “Monet” because that is her name and I only protect the names of
the guilty in this blog, is SUING McDonald’s because her claim is that even though she says “no” to her
kids when they want Happy Meals, the advertising of the fast food joint trumps her and entices her kids
to want the unhealthy meal no matter what she does, even telling them no. So, her solution, naturally, is
to sue McDonald’s, force them to make the Happy Meal “healthier” so her kids can partake in the
rotation of the weekly toy.

Normally, I would never call another mother out like this. Too many times, I’ve been on the receiving
end of the Mother Call Out. I’m a “live and let live” kinda gal, but my panties do get in a bunch over a
frivolous lawsuit. I hate to be the one to point out to Monet that you can actually buy the Happy Meal toy
without buying the Happy Meal, or let alone ANYTHING at Mickey D’s. But you can. You can fill your kids
up on soy milk, organically grown veggies washed with a special produce cleaning solution, and free
range chicken that you can cut into nuggets yourself and cover with homemade wheat bread and then
drive your happy and healthy ass to McDonald’s and buy the G-damned toy.
I have four kids. I am by no means unfamiliar with child harassment.
As a matter of fact, all four of my kids are master harassers. But I’m
still the adult and I have veto power and I’m not afraid to use it. I could
give two shits if my kids are upset with me if they can’t have the
weekly Happy Meal toy. Of all the things I’ve done, I find that to be the
least of my concerns for future therapy session topics. Far be it for
the Happy Meal if it’s against their beliefs. As
Nightline guy said (sorry
not a regular viewer so I don’t know his name) in reference to the
lawsuit, “Some feel this is un-American or all too American.”

And ironically, it IS both. We want our freedoms, but at the same time
we ask our government to intervene to take away someone else’s
freedoms. Instead of suing McDonald’s over their stupidly annoying
toys, why don’t we, as parents, take the opportunity to teach our
children some discipline and how to delay immediate self-gratification
instead of relying on the government to do our jobs as parents? I
mean that would serve them better in the long run than suing
McDonald’s to take away something that is perfectly legal, and well
an American icon. Monet states that she doesn’t want any money for
this lawsuit, just options for the children. Well Monet, you do have

So I guess I said all of that to say this: Monet, you don’t speak for me.
And I would guess there are many other mothers who would say the
same. Please stop asking our courts to take away time to hear your
stupid, frivolous lawsuit because you find it hard to say no to your kids. There are far more important
issues in front of these courts that DO impact our children’s lives.

Let them do their job. And in the meantime, Monet, do yours.
Seinfeld cast. Photo from ABC Broadcasting Corp.
Photos from McDonalds Restaurants.